Morcecambe. Rainy season. Next Sunday. Winona Smith manages her uncle's caravan park. He's ordered her to keep the park dull; the town council - feeling that the resort's image is being damaged by the strangeness of the occupants of its caravan parks - has promised a million pounds to the most normal park in Morecambe. If that million pounds isn't won, the park will close. 18 year-old Teena Rama is 148.7% too beautiful - and gaining a percentage point every two days. Soon no one will be able to meet her without falling in love. Mr Landen has no brain. But he does have a tub of margerine between his ears.